I do.....

When you announce your engagement, the tsunami of questions is inevitable. Not only the big one - " do you take each other, etc etc etc?", that's the easy one. It's the rest that are the hard work: "have you set a date? Where are you having it? Have you picked a dress? What about the guest list? What about favours, what music will you have?"
The list goes on. That's part of the tradition apparently, part of the fun.
People constantly tell you: "Make sure you choose what YOU want, it's all about you two, do whatever you want!"

But is that really true? What happens when you actually do what YOU want and that's different from the norm?
Well, it's the reactions to that decision that are telling.
"What do you mean you're doing that?", "oh really.....?" (it's the pause that gives it away, definitely the pause).
From one person, the exact words: "You can't just have that many people, have you actually thought this through? It's all about the day you know, that's the most important thing."

Obviously I find myself disagreeing. Is it all about the day? Is that the most important thing in what's supposed to be a lifetime of marriage? Obviously it's a big day, a cause for celebration, but is that all it boils down to? A celebration? Isn't marriage supposed to be more than that? Surely it's supposed to mean more than a big party, a plush hotel, a three-course meal and a disco. And those vows, whether they're said in a church, a hotel, a registry office, witnessed by 200 people, 50, or just a few - isn't it what's said that's important? The idea of vowing to stick together whether it's fun party times or the other, sometimes rubbish, times. That's what seems to be the important part - the marriage bit.
But it's not all doom and gloom. There's plenty of other reactions - all amazingly positive. It seems when the majority of people say do what you want, they actually mean it.
For many, the idea of doing something different sparks well wishes, and genuine joy: "That's great, you should do whatever makes you feel happy, whatever you choose, it'll be a lovely day."

And that, ladies and gentleman, surely sums it up. Whatever people do, it really should be what they want to do. After all, when the party's over, who's left? Not 200 people, or 50. No, when the food's eaten and the disco's over, it's just the two of you, "till death do us part."